Cher Lloyd Licking Piss of a Stinging Nettle
With her debut album release imminent, Cher Lloyd has been working exceptionally hard to break the habit of licking piss off a stinging nettle before making public appearances.
According to a source, Cher’s management initially tried to nurture her gurning into Elvis-like lip curls but realised quite quickly that no matter what they did, she still looked like a bulldog licking piss of a stinging nettle.
Rumour has it that Cher has actually opted to have botox injections all over her face and gob to stop her from gurning like an old geezer. This rumour is yet to be confirmed but it is thought that after her first botox treatment, she looked like she’d be slapped in the face with a bag of twats. Fortunately for Cher, the treatment subsided and her face started to look a little more natural again.
It is also understood that Cher’s frequent changes of hair style in recent weeks have been due to her management team trying to figure out which style would most disguise her gurning should she slip up on stage and forget to keep a straight face.
